I cant change me.. well I could but I dont really feel the need. I may improve on aspects of my life but I wont ever truly change who I am because it is not my personality.
I will always weigh more.. I dont understand it. Dr's talk about BMI. I dont get it. I work out. I walk. I run. I am active constantly. I worry. I stress about nearly everything. I eat. I love food. I dont tend to overeat. But I am a stress eater. When I was younger and smaller, I was about a size 4 and still the Drs said I was on the scale of being overweight because I weighed LOTs. I dont feel the need to be that size again. I am a mother. I am over 30. I attend weight watchers. They talk about BMI, my Dr talks about BMI. Do you think anyone ever takes into account that my legs are massive? That I can do more sit ups and push ups than most people I work with? Does anyone ever take anything like that into consideration? I am STILL considered Obese. Seriously? I am pretty happy I lost 23 pounds. Yes I know I still have more to lose but when will I be considered acceptable to society, Drs and Weight Watchers? I have lost 2 dress sizes. I am an average woman. I have a belly. I have scars. I have emotions. I still have my period which can cause mood swings but I still have mood swings anyway. Maybe none of this makes sense but these are the things that go through my mind on a weekly if not daily basis. I dont get it. I see so many women out there that are skinny, beautiful and wonder if they ever have the same feelings? I mean, I know of a situation where a woman weighs less than me but she wears three sizes more than me? How can this be? I dont even know. Do you think God intended for us to be this different and have all of these emotions? Do you think God intended for Drs to tell me that my BMI still says I am obsese? Does any of this make any sense? I seriously dont understand. My friend Rachel looks so awesome. We have been doing weight watchers together. She follows strictly the eating habits of Weight Watchers and has lost over 40 pounds. I have followed the eating stuff plus the activity and I have only lost 23. I dont understand it. Yes she is on her feet all day where I sit at a desk but I run! I run long distances. I do sit ups and push ups. I dont sit on my couch. GAWD.. Okay maybe I am done now. Who knows. But I have more things to post in the upcoming future about things in general like this and I dont really care if none of this made sense but apparently I say too many things in front of my son because he is worried that his belly is to big and he wants to be skinny... great. I know, I am a great mom. :P
1 comment:
Tina - You look great! Don't think that you don't! We all go through this in our head....at least I think we all do...I do. But you have Hunter...He is more important that a belly. Take pride in all that you can do- I'm sure you can outrun me, outsitup (totally a word) me, I know you can outpushup me...I can't do any! Be proud of what you can do....Hunter sees that.
Side note...You figured out the background?
Post a Comment